How we got here (Part One - Finding My Smile Again)

30^th March 2008

They always say that the most defining moments in your life happen when you least expect them. Now I don’t know who "they" are, and I’ve never really cared for this "they" lot, as they talk some utter rubbish on the whole, but they are right.

I only have to think back to nine days ago. Don’t ask me where in America I was, to me it was another show, another night, which would no doubt end with me having another dreamless sleep. I had been counting down like a child would count the remaining school days towards the end of the XHF. Then that night, nine days ago, as I left the hotel some man approached me. I say some man because by now I’d given up caring so much it was just another face. This man however had something to say to me, he was clearly a wrestling fan, and he was also clearly a patriot of his country. He spent two minutes hurling unanswered abuse at me, before telling me to "fuck off back to England". He stepped back and looked at me, looking pleased with himself and also expecting a big response from me. However I really don’t think he was expecting my answer.

You see whilst he was giving me this abuse I was thinking to myself, some of his words got in but generally I was away from his torrent. I wondered why am I doing this? Okay, I’m contractually obliged, but who was to say I couldn’t just walk out and go home? So when he said I should, to his shock, I smiled and said "you know what fella? You’re right, maybe I should." With that I walked away from him and into my car.

I got to the arena, arranged for a promo in the arena, and I went out there. The next five minutes were the most clear I’d had in months. I told the crowd, and the whole XHF that I was, I was taking my ball and going home. I had beaten any and every man or woman who challenged me. I’d beaten everybody so much nobody wanted to try me again. I told them all that if nobody was going to put up, I would shut up, liked they’d been hoping for so long.

What happened next however, wasn’t at all what I expected.

A man interrupted me, a very important man. The only problem was that it was Scorpion, quite possibly the only person I could call a friend. He was once the best wrestler you could have found in that company, however one major injury made him insane. Yes, insane. The guy still thought he was a fisherman and kept a pet worm. Such a fall from grace, but I befriended him when I first came to the company, we were both outsiders, and he was a good man. Yet there he was, making a rare appearance.

I said nothing for the next few minutes as the most mild-mannered guy in the business frankly tore into me. He told me either I face him or we team up for a final flourish. Nobody knew what to say, the crowd, nor myself. How could I face up to a man I deem a friend? A man who has no wrestling skills any more. Besides, who would face us as a team? I had no other option, I just left him in the ring. This wasn’t my plan, no, I still had to take off.

…That was still the plan…until management chewed me out about my actions and told me to make more effort to match-make for the final show. After telling them where to go they again chewed me out. So I was still to remain there, unhappy would have been understating my mood.

Then it happened…I suppose you could call it "The Event" or "The Trigger". That’s what "they" would call it anyway.

Twenty four hours later, what would be eight days ago. I was heading into the arena when I heard a commotion. I look round to see Scorpion being bullied by Congo the Destroyer, and Joey Hawke. A bully of a manager and well…Congo’s not very bright, let’s leave it there. For a second, I did nothing. Even now I still don’t know why I did that. I think it was the time I needed to realise everything that I missed was being attacked in front of my eyes. My friend was in need, and I had to help him. So I went over there, and dealt with them, as Rob Arnold would. I also killed a second bird with that stone, a tag match was made for the four of us, with the man who made the pinfall or submission taking the gold home, and would be the last ever European Champion.

In the next seven days I started to feel like me again. I was training Scorpion who to wrestle again, and generally be socially acceptable. It was a harder task that I’d bargained for, and frankly at times I wondered if I had made a massive mistake in all of this. Deep down though, I knew I wasn’t.

So it all came to tonight. I felt for the first time in so long that I actually wanted to wrestle. I really wanted go out and win and make it not even close. Like the old Rob Arnold, the Rob Arnold of the TXI, the CWA and the TXA. And just like that man I wanted to do it for others, not just me. Scorpion was a legend of the company, and he deserved his send off as well as me.

We went out, and I’d like to think we stole the show. Perhaps we did, because the Old Scorpion came back, something unlocked, and my god, we looked unbeatable. Hell I’d go into the tag team business with him after that performance. Here’s the thing though, I didn’t get the pin. This should bug the hell out of me, but it doesn’t. What it meant to Scorpion, what it meant to see a friend that happy, overrides any disappointment. I can’t think of a time where I’ve ever been like this.

So here I sit, alone in a locker room that’s pretty much cleared, just a few bags from a couple of guys who are in catering. I’ve had enough time to clean up and suit up once again. So for the last time, I grab my bag, and head out the building. As I head down the halls a fountain of thoughts flow through my head. First, in the form of memories. This is a company I have won three different titles, including the World Title. I’ve been hated, not so much loved. I’ve done quite a lot here, and there is a lot to be proud of. Despite the fact I've not been happy in the last six months, I think my achievements have balanced that out.

Now, as I walk through the final empty corridors of the build in towards the car park, I think of the future. I’m now a free agent, I can do what I like, to go anywhere. I think though that it’s time to go back home. Back to Sharon, back to my family and friends. Yeah, back to Somerset. A break from this business would do me good, and there’s plenty I can do in the UK. Besides, I’ve got enough money to carry me over for the time being.

I approach my car and unlock it, placing my belongings into the boot, and closing it carefully. I swivel around and stare at the arena one last time. I take a deep breath, and get into the car.

So that’s it then. Time to go home. Time to do a lot of things I haven’t done that I really want to. A smile creeps onto my face, the first genuine one for a while. I notice this in the mirror and can't help but laugh. I never thought I'd find my smile so soon, as "they" say, it does come when you least expect it. At that moment the phone in my pocket rings, it’s Sharon, more reason to smile.

"Hey gorgeous."

"Hey you, thought I’d call, watched it all, you were fantastic, are you okay with not getting the win?"

I Laugh, "yes, it’s fine, for the first time in a long time, it’s all very fine." I pause. "So what are your plans for the next few days? You see, I’ve made a decision, I’m coming home."

"You are? Oh Rob that’s great, how long for?"

"Well, and only if you like of course…permanently?"

There is a slightly stunned silence, before Sharon comes to terms with what I’ve just said.

"Are you actually being serious?"

"Deeply. I’ve had enough, you know this more than I do. This week has taught me something, and that you get the most pleasure in life by spending it with people you care about. So I’m coming home to you. It’s time for a change."

Again another pause.

"You know how happy this makes me?"

"I’ve got an idea, Sharon believe me!"

"Okay, well, I’ll see you at the airport, I’m guessing tomorrow?"

"You guess correctly, I’ll give you details when I book everything."

"Okay, get home safe. I love you."

"I love you too, now get some sleep, I know for a fact it’s 4AM over there."

We say our goodbyes and hang up. That settles it then, I’m done with wrestling, I never thought I’d say that but I am. Maybe I’ll miss it in the future, but right now, I’m out, I’m done. I start the car and look again at the arena. I give it a acknowledging nod, before pulling away, and away from the US and wrestling.

…I may even start dreaming again soon, how nice would that be?